Less Egoism: More Confidence!
Questioner: Where is the line of demarcation, between egoism and self-confidence? If a person has to do anything, he will not be able to do it, if he has no self-confidence.
Questioner: Is it what we call self-confidence?
Dadashri: No, the "confidence" may or may not be there, but ultimately the 'decision' will definitely come. Because when the time comes, the decision is undoubtedly made. The person with "self-confidence" will remain slightly fearless, while another person will continue to have fear and doubts.
Questioner: How are 'self confidence' and egoism (ahankar) related?
Dadashri: He who has self-confidence, is someone whose egoism has decreased slightly!
Questioner: Is it less or is it more?
Dadashri: It is less.
Questioner: Usually, we see that egoism and self-confidence are together.
Dadashri: It may seem that way to you, but basically the egoism (ahankar) is suppressed, and so the 'self-confidence' arises, otherwise it would not arise. Whenever a person's egoism is excessive (above a certain level); he will always lack self-confidence. He always gets frustrated and confused. He gets things sorted out, after three hours of frustration. And even then it is [only] when the evidence (circumstance) comes naturally, does his situation become resolved. One may have entanglements, but scientific circumstantial evidences (vyavasthit shakti) will sort things out for him.
Questioner: All the people who became great in this world; did they have greater 'egoism' or was their 'self-confidence' greater?
Dadashri: Their egoism was less. They had greater self-confidence. The more egoism a person has, the less capable he is to make a decision. He gets confused over which route he should take even when he wants to go to the railway station. Haven't you ever seen confused people?
Questioner: A man may be egoistic and yet he makes a certain degree of progress on the basis of his egoism, does he not?
Dadashri: That too, is egoism, but his egoism is less than that of other people. His egoism is less than the one who is getting puzzled. He has got rid of the egoism by finding the ‘solutions’ and by doing the research. He has done ‘research’ about egoism whereas the other person hasn’t done the research at all!
Questioner: Is there no egoism when his confidence has gone beyond (that of others)?
Dadashri: No, that is not so.
Questioner: What is the advantage of egoism?
Dadashri: Egoism does nothing, so what could be its’ advantage? Egoism always causes damage; it causes interference. So tell me, what damage does egoism do? These people do egoism and what advantage do they get? As much egoism as one does, it not really him doing it, meaning he is projecting and that is why he gets the results in the next life. He is himself instilling the life force (pratishtha) into the non-self, for the next life!
Questioner: He is going through the results of the old karma and believes that ‘I did this’?
Dadashri: Yes, he is going through the result; no egoism is to be done therein, right!
Questioner: But that is what people are doing, right? This is what happens in everyday life, right?
Dadashri: Yes, he does the egoism of doing ‘I did’. He says, ‘I came by train. I took a bath. I went to the toilet. I drank tea.’ And he believes it to be correct too, he is confident about it also. However, there is no objection in speaking this way dramatically.
Questioner: So when he says this, he is getting bound for the next life?
Dadashri: The projections (pratishtha) that he makes of his own self, he creates and sculpts with a chisel. He creates his own statue; a statue with four legs, six legs, eight legs or two legs! So if you don’t have trust in two legs, why don’t you make a four-legged statue; at least you will not fall down! And if he places a tail in the back, he can hold the tail high and run like this!
Questioner: Does the self-confidence go up as the egoism gets purified?
Dadashri: To get purification of the egoism is a different matter. But the purification won’t happen here! A technique for the purification is necessary. There is a technique for it. And when the purification is complete, liberation will occur.
1) Only when numerous circumstances come together can an event take place. However, you claim with egoism, "I did it."You take credit for things that turn out good but blame others or bad luck when things do not turn out as planned.
2) Sanyog (an event, association of circumstances) and viyog (dissipation of circumstances) occur on their own. But a man with ego (ahankar) takes the credit. When a man earns money, he says, "I earned it," but when he suffers losses, he loses all confidence and despairs, "What could I do?"
Book Name: Aptavani 10 (U) (Page #501 Paragraph #2 tp #8, Entire Page # 502 & #503, Page #504 - Paragraph #1)