Questioner: What are the qualities of a true guru?
Dadashri: The true guru is one that has love and is beneficial to you. Where can you find such real gurus? Such a guru is one where just at the mere sight of him, your whole body will bow down in reverence, spontaneously without a thought. That is why they sing:
'Who can be called a guru? It is the one whose very sight makes our heads bow.'
Just upon seeing him, our head will bow. That is the definition of a guru. That is why if one is a guru, then he must be such that he dissolves all egos. Then you can attain liberation, but not otherwise.
Questioner: Then there is the question, 'Whom should I make my guru?'
Dadashri: Where your heart rests; make that person your guru. Do not call him your guru until your heart becomes completely still. That is why I have said if you make someone your guru; make sure it is someone whose image does not leave your 'eyes'.
Questioner: What do you mean by 'does not leave your eyes'?
Dadashri: When a young man wants to get married, he goes to look at different young women. He will meet and see many girls. What is he looking for? He is looking for the kind of woman who would be acceptable in every way. If she is fat, she will feel heavy to his eyes. If she is very skinny then he feels hurt; he understands by looking into her eyes. So what do we mean by 'a guru that does not leave your eyes?' It means that he is acceptable to your eyes in every way. His speech fits you; it is tailor-made for you, his conduct also fits. This is the kind of guru you need!
Questioner: Yes, that is correct. The total dependence (ashritpanu) on the guru demands such qualities.
Dadashri: Yes, if ever a guru is such that he can dwell in your heart and you like everything he says, then you can become dependent on him. Thereafter you will be free from all suffering. A guru is a very big phenomenon. With him, you should feel that you are at peace and that you have come home and your heart rests there. Just by looking at him, you forget the world, you become oblivious to the world; such a person can be made a guru. Otherwise, the guru loses his worth and importance.
1) You have met a guru if conflicts and discord at home come to an end, otherwise how can you say you have met a guru?
2) One can only be defined a guru if he is living and present for you, and you absorb his teachings with unmatched intensity (dharan), such that over a few months there develops a guru-shishya (master-disciple) relationship.
3) The Lord has said that as long as there is anger, pride, deceit and greed within; do not preach to anyone.
4) The general rule is that anything in the world that is given away will decrease, but only gnan (knowledge) will increase! This is natural. OnlyGnan! Nothing else! Everything else will decrease. One person asked me why I disclose everything I know instead of holding some knowledge back. I told him that this Gnan increases by giving. Both mine, and his, will increase so what am I losing?