How to deal with anger in a relationship?

Anger itself is the ego. One must examine why this is so. Once we look into it, we will be able to grasp it. If we get angry when something breaks, we have to question why the anger occurs. The answer would be that the breakage means a loss. It is because of the loss that we feel angry. If one thinks deeply about the ego and the anger, the very process of thinking will wash away his ego. There are circumstances that are unavoidable. The head of the household will scold his servant for breaking things, but he would remain silent if his son-in-law were to do the same. He remains silent with the people he considers important and he yells at the servant, whom he considers to be inferior. This is egoism. Do people not become silent in the presence of their superiors? If Dada were to break something, not even a single thought would cross their minds, but if the servant were to break something, then what? Even if people understood with their buddhi (intellect), it would suffice! If the buddhi had been developed and molded with understanding, then there would be no arguments. Will the scolding help restore the damage? It only gives one a little satisfaction. Moreover, there is bickering and mental stress involved in it.

In the above situation, one has not only incurred a loss from the broken cups, but also a loss from inner restless has been created. Thirdly, a loss has occurred because of hostility created towards the servant. The servant thinks that he is being cruelly treated because he is poor. He will harbor hostility and will bind revenge karma for next life. God has said that one should not bind vengeance with anyone. Where possible, bind love but do not bind hostility. If you bind love, then that love itself will destroy the hostility. Love overcomes hatred. Vengeance will breed vengeance and it will continue to do so forever. Vengeance is the reason for the endless wanderings life after life. Why do these human beings wander endlessly?

What obstacles arise? Where do the obstructions arise? We should destroy them. It is because of one's shortsightedness that he encounters obstructions. The Gnani Purush gives you the 'long-sight' that will enable you to see things exactly the way they are.