How to eliminate negative thoughts with positive thoughts?

To turn negativity into positivity, only the perspective needs to be changed. For example, what should we do to remove all the air from an empty bottle? No matter how many techniques we try, the air won’t just leave. But if the bottle is filled with water, then the air will escape automatically. Similarly, in every matter where negative arises, if we focus on the positive, then the negative will automatically fade away. This is the simplest key to how to stay positive in a negative world. Ultimately, we have to develop such awareness that our mind or intellect never turn negative in any situation.

Param Pujya Dada Bhagwan says, “What does positive mean? You do not have to take out anything, you do not have to remove anything, you only have to bring.” He says that, “Instead of wasting time trying to destroy negativity, the negativity will break automatically if one remains positive in worldly life”

Seeking one positive out of a hundred negatives

Param Pujya Dada Bhagwan says, “I want to make everything positive. I don’t want there to be any negatives. If he is good, then I encourage his good attributes. So, the good attributes are illuminated, they occupy so much space that the negatives go away”

We see negative of other people, “He is an incompetent person, is unfit.” Rather than seeing that, we should try and find out what is positive in them and focus on the positives only. We should not squabble over the other person’s negative; he will see his own negatives and come out of it. We should encourage the good in the person, and in his wrong behavior, remain silent or don’t give it any importance, so that the person realizes that I didn’t get any response. Eventually his negatives will gradually decrease. There may be a hundred negatives in the other person, but if we find out one positive from that and hold onto it, then the situation and the person shall automatically change. To do so, we will have to impartially cultivate tremendous equanimity and patience.

Param Pujya Dada Bhagwan says that, “We win over the ‘negative’ with ‘positive’.” We don’t have to win the entire world; we just have to win the very close four-five people in our family and inner circle. If we can see their positives, see them faultless, and if our attachment-hatred towards them decrease, that itself is more than enough.

The ultimate and the highest positive vision is to see the other person in the form of pure Soul. As a result, not a single fault of theirs is seen; they appear completely faultless.

Seeing positive, speaking positive

Just like every coin has two sides, each individual also has some good and some bad aspects. Where there is a rose plant, thorns are bound to be there, but the aim of the gardener is to make the rose bloom without touching the thorns. Similarly, we also should see people’s positive qualities and speak positive only. Things on the outside will not change to bring us peace; instead, we must transform from within. If we cultivate a positive perspective in every situation, neither we nor the other person will suffer.

Many a times, if some person hurts our ego, we see their negative and talk ill about them to others. But in doing so, neither the person nor the situation changes for the better On the contrary, because of the negativity, we ourselves undergo suffering, and bind karmas leading to a lower life-form.

Even if a person comes to us talking negative about another person, we should not let their negativity impact us If we do, it becomes a hurdle to turn negativity into positivity effectively.  That person may be venting out their anger, but we should remain superficial there. Also, right now that person is feeling negative towards the other person, and four days later, they could turn positive as well. Whereas, when their words instill negativity about others in our mind, we become trapped. In worldly interactions, when listening to one person, if we bind an opinion for the other person, then we are considered gullible.

Generally, one should have a rule about never talking negative about a person who is not present. If necessary, say five positive things about the person, but do not speak negative. So, knowing how to stay positive in difficult times does not mean thinking only positive—it also means not hearing and speaking negative.

Param Pujya Dada Bhagwan has given a beautiful principle which we all should get framed:

“One should adopt one principle in the life. One should always remain positive. Never give any support to the negative. Whenever any negativity arises, one should remain silent.” – Dada Bhagwan

Adjust by seeing the positive of different natures (prakrutis)

At home, in family or in office, when we come in contact with more than one person, on having to deal with people of different natures, naturally clashes happen. In such a situation, if we find out the positive of each individual and adjust with them, the interactions will be peaceful.

Everyone’s nature, everyone’s viewpoints are different. Moreover, worldly interactions are relative. While once, the work gets done according to one person’s viewpoint, another time, it happens according to some other person’s viewpoint. Therefore, one should not hold onto one’s own viewpoint. We should learn how to let go of our viewpoint. After the work is done, understand, move forward with the mindset of "Whatever happened is correct," so that peace prevails in the worldly interactions, and at the same time, our progress also remains unhindered.

Get work done by finding out the positives of different people bearing different natures. Just like in a band, there’s a harmonium, a drum, a flute, and even a tambourine. Each instrument sounds different; but when they are all played in harmony, then a melodious music is produced. Similarly, amongst people living or working together, while one is slow, the other is fast, while someone is strong, another is weak. Even in our mouth, the tongue is soft, it gathers the food, and the teeth are hard which then break it down. While chewing food, both are necessary. Likewise, if we find the good qualities of a person and work with them accordingly, then every nature becomes beneficial. Having such information handy is a simple way to turn negativity into positivity while dealing with a negative person.

Stay positive even if the other person hurts you

No matter how much the other person hurts us we should maintain the understanding that they speak and act based on their own perspective and lack of understanding. We should not see that person’s negative. Rather, we should constantly remain positive. By becoming negative ourselves, if we oppose the other person, then conflicts shall increase.

We also, based on our viewpoint, consider the other person to be at fault. Reminding yourself here of how to stay positive can help you stop taking people and their talks in a negative way. The same person may be behaving nicely with others. Some people may hurt us, but later they regret and come back apologizing to us. In that case, there’s no point keeping a note of the past experience and fighting over it. What we had given in the past, has come back to us today in order to settle the account. We should deposit it and stop any new lending. If the other person is hurting us, is it because they are being hurt because of us? We should try and find out if that is the case, and if so, take measures to prevent it.

If someone tells us, 'You lack intelligence,' then we should examine how many matters in the world exist in which we truly lack intelligence. Suppose, at workplace, if someone insults us, “You don’t understand anything”, then our ego reacts. But rather, we should set such an understanding that apart from this, there are thousands of things in the world that we don’t know. For example, constructing a house, repairing a broken phone, flying an aircraft, etc. Hence, there’s no need to be egoistic about the five-seven things we know; this way we can bring a solution.

In short, even if a person behaves with us in a manner where our intellect and ego are provoked and shows negative of the other person; if we keep a stock of the right understanding ready, we can remain positive in the face of such negativity.

Maintain positive efforts

Param Pujya Dada Bhagwan gives a beautiful key for remaining positive.

Dadashri: Soul is positive and intellect is negative, (intellect) makes one think one’s not allowing this to happen and is not allowing that to happen.  We don’t have to see what one’s not allowing to happen; we have to see what is one allowing. Then, in many ways internally, it keeps helping in every manner.

So, the intellect wastes our time and it doesn’t allow us to be happy. And we should say, “No part of me is incomplete.” “Blessed is this day!” when Shrimad Rajchandra got enlightened, He said, ‘Oh, how blessed is this day!’

Therefore, at our place, there are no negative talks, only positive talks exist. Negative is all worldly talk, it wastes time, entangles, and doesn’t allow us to be happy.

Staying positive during failure

When situation does not turn out according to our expectation, when we face failure, we inevitably become negative. The best way to turn negativity into positivity during such times has been provided by Param Pujya Dada Bhagwan. Suppose we are playing a game of dice, and we expect that all the dice shall roll in our favor only, then even if one dice falls adverse, our mind becomes negative and we lose our joy. But internally, if we maintain that the dice may not always roll in our favor, then if even one dice rolls in our favor, we would feel happy. In other words, if we have an anticipation of full success, then even in a small failure, we would become negative, we wouldn’t be able to tolerate failure at all. But if we are prepared for total failure, we can remain positive even with little success. This doesn’t mean we should always think negative about the result that, ‘I will surely fail’; but having this internal adjustment prepares us for unfavorable outcomes, and we don’t become negative then.

Param Pujya Dadashri was in the contracting business by profession. Sharing the crux from His experience, He says that no matter how much loss we incur in the business, we should not let it affect us. If there is loss today, there will be profit tomorrow. We cannot give up and just sit there feeling defeated, can we? Once, Param Pujya Dadashri also incurred a loss in business. As a result, He started worrying at night and couldn’t sleep. But He was a man of keen insight and exceptional wisdom. Then He began to reflect,” Did I suffer the loss, or the business did?” When there is a profit in the business, everyone in the family shares it. But now that there’s a loss, why should I be bearing it alone? If we distribute this loss among the family members and partners, how much would my share really be? That’s all I should be worried about.

Not just in business matters but this is how in every matter, when things happen contrary to what we anticipated and even slight discomfort arises, we must find out something positive in it.

Erasing negativity through repentance

If we have negative thoughts about someone, or if we've spoken negatively about someone, then whenever we realize that this was wrong, we should immediately remember that person and seek forgiveness from them, with repentance. And with a resolve to not repeat this mistake, ask for strength from the God we have faith in.

Negative thoughts, speech or behavior will not stop. But by repenting heartily, our negative opinions fade away. As we continue to turn negativity into positivity and as we keep repentingventually one day we will stand transformed from negative to positive.

Every night, think about who all did I meet throughout the day? Where did negative happen? About whom did I speak negative for? Remember all of that and eek forgiveness for it. Doing so, negative will quickly get erased and positive will set in.