I have big row with my wife, who is at fault?

Questioner : Some people just do not understand, no matter how nicely you interact with them.

Dadashri :  If they do not understand, then the fault is yours. Why did you get such a person with limited understanding? Why is it that only you had to have an encounter with such a person? Anytime you have to suffer, know that it is the consequence of your own mistakes.

Questioner : So do I have to accept that such is my own karma?

Dadashri: Definitely. If there is no mistake on your part, you will not have to suffer anything. There is nobody in this world that can hurt you in the slightest but if someone does, then it is because of your own mistake. The other person is simply instrumental in the process of your own unfolding karma. Therefore, the fault is of the sufferer.

A husband and wife get into a big row with each other and then retire to bed. The wife is sleeping soundly and snores while the husband tosses and turns in bed. Understand that the husband is the one at fault because he is the one suffering, not the wife. The one who is at fault is the one who suffers. If he falls asleep and the wife cannot, then recognize that she is the one at fault. Fault is of the sufferer.

This science is extraordinary. What I am telling you is a very subtle science. The whole world blames only the apparent doer (nimit).

Related Spiritual Quotes by Param Pujya Dadashri : 1) If you have difference of opinions, that is your weakness. People are not wrong. No one does anything deliberately. You should ask for forgiveness and accept that you are at fault. We should ask for forgiveness that I am at fault.
2) There are worldly judges everywhere in this world, but there is only one judge of karma (deeds), the "fault is of the sufferer"! This is the only justice, on which the whole world is running, and the worldly life continues to stand on the illusory justice.

Glossary : Karma : The cycle of cause and effect life after life; To support the action with the belief 'I am the doer' is called binding the karma.
Nimit- One who becomes instrumental in a process; Apparent doer; A living or non-living instrumental evidence in unfolding karma effect; Evidentiary instrument.

Did you know : There is a book named "The fault is of the sufferer"- Read on to understand the science behind it.

Reference : Book Name : Life without conflict (Page #69 Paragraph #2, #3, #4, #5, #6 & #7)