Questioner : We forget the morning’s conflict by the afternoon, but in the evening, something new crops up.

Dadashri : I know the force at work behind these conflicts. I know what force is working when she is being argumentative. In a conflict, we say things and then we adjust. For the one who has received gyan (the knowledge of Self-Realization), this is easily understood. Others who have not received this knowledge must adjust in this world because every conflict eventually comes to end. If any conflict continues, everyone involved suffers. You hurt yourself and you hurt others.

In every situation if you adjust to the other person, how beautiful life will be. After all, what do we take with us when we die?  “I will set her straight,” he says.  If you attempt to make her straight, you yourself will become crooked. Do not try to improve your wife.  Just accept her as she is. That is the key to happiness.  It would be a different matter if you had a permanent relationship with her life after life. Who knows where she will be in her next life?  You will both die at different times. Your karma is different. If you manage to improve her in this life, she will be someone else’s wife in her next life.

Therefore, do not try to improve her. She too, should not attempt to improve you.  Whatever she is, she is as good as gold.   You cannot improve another’s prakriti (inherent characteristics) ever, however hard you try.  A dog’s tail remains crooked, no matter how hard you try to straighten it. So be careful and let her be whatever she is. Adjust Everywhere.